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Articles & Resources
Here are some articles and resources that you may find inspiring or helpful...
Self-Compassion
So what is self-compassion? In this interview in The Atlantic, Kristin Neff of SelfCompassion.org says it is treating yourself with the same kindness, care, and compassion you would give those you care about—your good friends, your loved ones. That seems obvious right? But she goes deeper:
But it also entails a recognition of common humanity—the understanding that all people are imperfect, and all people have imperfect lives. Sometimes, when we fail, we react as if something has gone wrong—that this shouldn't be happening. “I shouldn't have failed, I shouldn't have had this issue come up in my life.” That type of thinking, "That this shouldn't be happening,” as if everyone else in the world were living perfectly happy, unproblematic lives really causes a lot of additional suffering. It makes people feel isolated and separated from the rest of humanity.
So, when we have self-compassion, when we fail, it's not “poor me,” it's “well, everyone fails.” Everyone struggles. This is what it means to be human. And that really radically alters how we relate to failure and difficulty. That opens the door to the growth from our experiences.
Poke around on Kristin's website, there are some wonderful guided meditations there that you might like.
Adverse Childhood Experiences
There is a brand new podcast that I think is terrific. It's called Climb Out To Sobriety, and in a recent episode, Hammond Chamberlin, VaRonica Little, LCSW, and Misty McIntyre Goodsell, LCSW have a fascinating discussion about how Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) can lead to mental health issues, addictions, even chronic health problems for adults. They have a great explanation about how and why therapy is helpful for healing trauma:
A therapist helps you better understand what might have happened to you throughout your life that is causing so much distress that your coping skills are insufficient to manage it, and so you end up self medicating in some way.
The goal of therapy is to help you process your experience, re-examine it, decide to do something different, learn the skills you need. You learn to leave the past in the past, as much as that is possible for any human being to do.
Their discussion is well worth listening to, and the website offers a plethora of helpful resources.